I’ve done it countless times. When it comes to talking with my teenage daughters, you can bet money I’ll say the wrong thing, ask the wrong question, and inadvertently cut short the promise of a satisfying conversation. Apparently I’m not the …
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Learning to be God’s Access to Your Teen
As an adoptive parent to two teenagers, I want every tool that’s out there in my resource kit: blogs, webinars, books–especially books. Lots and lots of books. As I encounter things that I find useful to my parenting journey, I …
When Your Adopted Teen’s Birthday is Hard
It’s birthday season at our house. Three birthdays in less than a month’s time. I’m learning that for adopted teens, birthdays aren’t all frosting and balloons. Perhaps, as their bodies mature into potential baby-makers and progenitors of their own, they’re …
What the Baby Name Book Didn’t Tell You About Your Adopted Child
She captured our hearts from the moment we first looked at her photo in the referral packet. From that second, she was ours. And the very first thing we did? Before we even held her? We named her. This precious …
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To All You Moms of Adopted Teens
To all you moms of adopted teens, I see you. I see you in the bleachers after a 4-hour track meet, still wearing your work clothes. I see you late at night in the grocery store stocking up on tampons …
When the Gift is Waiting Inside the Fold
Daughter #1 has been home for nearly 11 years and I never even looked at her adoption paperwork until the other day. Let me explain. Her adoption took 4 years to complete. When we brought her home, I finally had …
When the Dogs You Rescue, Rescue Your Teens
Our dog Buckley was a Chocolate Lab with deep, soulful eyes. We brought him home before the girls. When he died, so did a piece of my heart. Best dog ever. “No more dogs” my husband declared. And he thought the …
In His Image, but not Mine
“I want to dye my hair,” Daughter #2 stated. Again. I looked at the long, near-black hair on her head, the stuff magazine ads are made of. Trying to muster the energy for yet another round on this topic, I …
Whose Kids are These?
I sat on the suitcase watching my daughters, ages 5 and 6, play tight-rope walker on the parking bumpers in the car rental return parking lot. My husband was inside, handling paperwork. The girls were 10 feet away from me …
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“Mom, do you think of me as your adopted daughter?” I pulled out of the pick-up lane as my 13-year-old daughter buckled up for the ride home from school. The question seemed to come out of nowhere, but I shouldn’t …